i have now been nicknamed the screamer on the first, third, fourth, & six floor by all the ra's. only two more floors to go before i cover the entire dorm.
I'd be surprised if he had a problem with boundaries after helicoptering his penis in front of you
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Kate gave me a 3 day old cup of tequila last night and forced me to chug it. P.s. i drew u a picture
Your never gonna wash that desperation outta that sweatshirt you know.
I mean I drunk but not enough to handle a Scientology convention
she just blew up the empty bag of wine and used it as a floatation device.
I liked a picture of him with his pants around his ankles, if that doesn't say I'm into you, I don't know what does.
It is a sign that I need a fresh start when Kelly Clarksons new album tells the story of my life.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
It's a good thing my liver is flexible because a lesser man would be dead
I am so sorry. Not sure for what, but whatever I did last night probably merits an apology, so I'm covering my bases.
My new superpower is making fuckboys disappear!
Bending dicks and egos since 2002
There's a big ass bed, hella ecstasy, and I can guarantee you'll regret every second that you remember.
Randomize
