Dual....:-)
Fuck?...well quicky, i have to study...unless you can read my book while i bang you, then it can last four chapters
I can be that talented
I have 11 glasses of water and one beer on the table infront of me. Have to keep going to different bartends to get more. There are only two though and I think they've caught on
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
you cant just puke in an arbys and not order food. thatd be rude.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
I can always make him wear a mask... I'll tell him it's a fetish.
I'm sorry the first time we hungout you had to witness me throw up in the ocean then army crawl to shore.
Sometimes you gotta say "hey, its been a long semester. Let's puke before 10"
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Idk dude but he said something bout his "dick was gonna be so tan" then he jus jumped out of the car
I was chasing disarono with Bacardi and watching ice cube movies. It would have been an epic birthday if I wasn't by myself and actually had some decent friends.. Hint. Asshole.
If I had a penis, I'd want to put it in you. And I'd treat you with respect and pay for your drinks.
That's probably why white girls drink so much espresso. Piledriving coke and vodka crans takes a fucking toll man
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
Randomize
