I was in the bathroom and heard my brother scream "YOU FAIL!!!", and I swear to GOD, I thought my penis was yelling at me.
I imagine the nuva ring like a bug zapper. It just kills them all.
Just so we're clear. I'm still making jello shots and bringing them to the bar in my purse. I don't care if its half off margaritas. Don't want anyone thirsty
I'm pretty sure they had a hash wedding cake. I love college weddings.
Life gets in the way of sexy Saturday sometimes
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
I'm pricing out a roll of that wax butcher paper. We fuck too messy and I can't afford to wash them every afternoon.
I shaved last nite, you should see my cock it looks like a beautiful skyscraper
Obviously last night's theme was "Let's Make Bad Life Choices"
Eating an avocado like an apple while doing shots of fireball and watching finding nemo. I need to get my shit together.
I came on her face and asked if she wanted fries with that. Currently driving to McDonald's.
Wtf. So apparently this 5 star establishment doesn't allow strip putt putt in the parking lot. We all just got kicked out of our rooms.
I have rug burns on my nipples. Thanks for being an awesome wing girl.
I made it out of the house. Success.
It's not better out here. I'm at Target hyperventilating in the aisles.
Randomize
