So I got my period. Finally. In related news, I reinstated my belief in God.
he made me salute his american flag boxers before i took them off
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
The only good thing about ohio is that i can get 2 half gallons of soco for 40 bucks
that's the ideal party shoe. cute, but i can still puke in them.
I walked outside out to find her peeing in her toga with a cigar in one hand and her thong in the other
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
Nah, this is the University of Tennessee. She'll get the clap, and get busted for having pot in her dorm by spring break. This time next year she'll be part-timing at a community college as a nursing major. So predictable it hurts.
This girl invited us back on the promise of weed and strudel...she delivered neither.
Thanks. It's every girl's dream, right? To blow a bald marketing consultant 12 years her senior?
Facebook: “Hey you fucked on a diving board, you should probably should wish him a happy birthday”
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
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