you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
Google if cops ever smoke weeds and then bust them. I need to know immidiately.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop texting my girlfriend.
i would really appreciate it if you would stop cock blocking me.
Every time he makes fun of me for anything I just remind myself he ate ice cream out of a strippers vagina
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
Dammit. I drunkenly drank all my milk at 6 AM in a misguided stupor to prevent my roommates from stealing my milk.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
dude I'm not 100% but I think your mom is sexting me.
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
thank you for extending my knowledge of the effects of vodka. speak of what happened last night and i will kill you and send your fingers to your loved ones.
I just wish my penis was a person so I could give him a high five.
i would stab him if he didn't just tell me he is a priest
I'm over being sad. I'm now onto thinking about all the ways in which he is a total fuckwaste
What is it about fresh air and wanting to talk about penises
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
Randomize