i wish swine flu would become a total pandemic so we cld be rid of all the people that are complaining about it
i barely touched his dick and all of a sudden he yells, "BONER!"
OMG MY MOM JUST ASKED IF I WAS GETTING PAP SMEAR TOMORROW VERY LOUDLY WHILE WE ARE STANDING IN A VERY PUBLIC LINE.
yes we were fucking thats why i put "watching a movie" in quotations
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
This is me reassuring you that I'm still alive and making sure you still are.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
So immediately after we finished having sex she started singing, "The Circle of Life", put her clothes on and then just left. I think I'm in love.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Did you take the full box of samoas or do I not remember getting baked and eating half a box by myself?
He invited to drink but spelled forties wrong so no thx
We walked 3 miles to the strip club. Stopped for roadies, it wasn't that bad.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
Randomize
