do you think he would believe thats it not really my period, and that i ate a lot of licorice?
You covered in salsa con queso would take care of all of my cravings right now
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
if i find out your the one who pierced my belly button im going to fuck your sister again
Just took my birth control pill next to the cubicle where we had sex last semester.
It just hurt to pee because he was fingering for fucking gold in there.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
This is what we get for YOLOing our way to obesity
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
How do we have all these hot friends who we never do body shots off of
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I think I'd rather see her get hit by a car in one of those Russian dash cam videos on YouTube.
Don't mind me, I'm just walking 2 miles across campus with no jacket, covered in highlighter, and carrying a hair extension. Gotta love miami!
I know that whole thing was awkward. Not worth the piece of cake.
I want you to worship my cock.
That's not how you start a conversation.
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