there are 10 yearolds here who keep calling me on the elbow rule!
Wait are they playing beer pong to?
I was really sad when you left and cried. And i don't know what a face promise is, but apparently i made you make one.
I think my mom knows im high. It could be because im slow dancing with my cat in the kitchen. The dip and kiss is what gave it away.
I gave you head at the stadium on a Thursday night ESPN game. That damn well better be worth points on the score board!!!
I CAN CONTROL MY GERBIL WITH MY BREATH. HE FOLLOWS THE SMELL. PROBABLY WOULDNT BE AS EXCITING IF I WASNT HIGH OFF MY ASS, BUT STILL
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Some kid just stopped wherever he was walking, turned to me, and gave me a slow clap. So I'm pretty sure my walk of shame beats yours.
my vagina is like this close to growling at me and leading me onto the nearest dance floor
make it buy you a drink first
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
The orgasm I got from him made me feel almost as good as I imagine the girls in the tampon commercials feel.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
So I took my bra off and threw it in the bushes before we went to the bars..
School supplies are right next to the margarita mix at target. Its a sign
The bartender remember my drink from last sat. I think we just became drocals...drunk. locals.
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