North Korea, Best Korea!
Erin Andrews shaves. She also likes to check out her ass in the mirror. Of course if I had an ass like that I'd be checking it out in the mirror too.
yeah. and then it was like the room of requirement. the elevator just opened for our threesome.
I was to drunk to drive all the way up there, so we just had rough phone sex instead
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
I also like to call Halloween "Mystery Fuck Day"
Nothing like a false "my-dad-found-my-weed" alarm on Christmas day.
also please imagine me hopping a fence at 3am using two chairs. It was a shit show. K's guy practically ripped her off the top of the fence bc she got semi stuck. It was like watching Disney on Bud Ice.
We decided to keep having sex while I ordered the pizza. I wanted extra pepperoooooooooooooni.
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
I feel like your dick pick is everywhere. Never have I needed to be so careful when posting pictures.
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
THAT HOSPITAL MADE ME REALIZE THAT I'M BISEXUAL
I'm just going to use my debit card. I feel bad buying pizza with the money I stole from my roommate...so I'm going to put it in my piggy bank.
In the past year, I've fucked 3 Dave's and you've fucked 2 Dave's. That's a lot of Dave's in our vaginas.
We need to start a soap opera called the Dave's of Our Lives.
Randomize
