every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
Mango Malibu should win a nobel peace prize
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
I couldn't even finish, she was lounder and more annoying than DJ Khaled
The doctor put me on 3000 mg of amoxicillin a day. Which, for a sinus infection, seems pretty excessive to me.
Maybe he was just trying to knock out any potential ghonorrhea you might be carrying around.
Ah, my reputation precedes me.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
She dumped a fish bowl of alcohol on herself. Just like flash dance.
I don't think you seem to understand this concept. WHEN A GAY GUY HANDS YOU A DAIQUIRI, YOU DRINK IT.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
I mean there is a rehab there so its gotta be a good time
Man my junk looks like a mangled grapefruit right now, this shit sucks.
You having your own car has severely reduced the amount of blowjobs I get.
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
Randomize
