If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
he's like a stage 5 clinger and he won't even fuck me. he has to be gay. my personality isn't really THAT great.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I only feel half bad for cheating on him because while we were fucking I was given great relationship advice and now I'm ready to work some things out.
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
On a scale of zero to "unmitigated disaster," how drunk is he?
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
Oh and Dustin informs me I'm a legend amongst the freshman, if you were wondering about my street cred
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
Hypothetically speaking, if a girl asks you to fuck her wearing only your hockey helmet, is that socially acceptable?
My boyfriend's mom is the manager of Wendy's. The same one I took a pregnancy test in.
Randomize
