I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Using manwich sauce as ketchup. Not bad. Love college.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
i'm having the hardest time convincing my roommates to go dumpster diving for pizza with me. i really miss you..
She is still a psychotic unstable bitch, and is therefore PERFECT drinking game fodder
that man is just a bundle of powerful magic and poor judgment
My dad just asked if I could bring snacks to jail this weekend. Like what does he think this is, some type of adult play date?
One day we'll be rich enough to go to rehab. Until then, fuck it.
At first I was nervous about leaving him my undergraduate legacy, but apparently he made out with lesbians, woke up with hickeys and a different shirt. My family name will survive.
My mom wants to name our new dog the same name as my fuck buddy. This will be weird
I can't hang out with this penis. I'll start thinking I like the person it belongs to.
Casey, if you want the continuing love of our mother, you're gonna need to stop drunk texting her from PCB.
Omg there's puke under my pillow. Clearly I puked and tried to hide it. From myself. \n
What's the protocol for doing tequila shots at a baseball game when you're chaperoning for a church group? You know, hypothetically.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
Randomize
