is your mom at the bar?
My new storm is the chrons
The only reason I needed a new one is bc I threw up on my other one(248): And since Verizon doesn't have a throw up test, I was eligible for a new one
You gave him your vagina and this is what I get in return? This is bullshit!
She refers to my dick as princess Sarah... oddly I'm okay with that.
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Look if you're not going to be mine and take care of my needs, I'm going to fuck your sisters.
I seriously think my heart may fail. And I didn't even grab a toilet beer :(
I'm looking for mother nature. And when I find her, I'm looking her right in the eyes and telling her to fuck off.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
Your trash is full of condoms and yoohoos what a great life we live
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
Dude is PACKING. And yes I am holding up a cross and holy water and hissing like a pissed off goose.
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
holy shit! you were walking down a hill and just happened to be passing a trash can like 4 ft away and projectile vomited over a fence into the trash can. kept walking and drank a beer.
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