So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
Mid thrust he tells me that we have bio together
You just kept mumbling, "Shit shit shit, the muffin man owes me money." Repeatedly.
Made a visit to my old puking stall. I missed it.
i'm going through an 80s music phase. and by phase i mean i will only have sex to white snake
I made my own utility belt like Batman. It has a cup holder for my beer, cell phone holder, a little pocket for condoms, and a sewing kit just in case.
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
The real reason I can't work: it's Tuesday. I get stoned and watch Buck Rodgers on Tuesday.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
THEIR PENISES MATCH. I JUST REALISED THAT. THEY HAVE IDENTICAL DICKS. OH GOD.
My mom is currently drinking alone in our kitchen singing the Dixie Chicks to herself so, hey, alcohol is forever and we should not be shamed for its use.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
How does one acquire holy water?
What happened last night dude?
YOU SHIT ON MY FUCKING COFFE TABLE THATS WHAT FUCKING HAPPENED!!!
And when were you going to tell me to stop dancing on his coffee table singing "come on irene?"
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