I hate u. Im listening to lady gaga and all i can hear is boca base om om om ommmm
he puts the penis in happiness.
Your noise violation report contains the word "five-some"...wtf happened in here?
all ill say about last night is that we tried to stop you. oh and the bus you're on is going to nashville.
she's drunk at 2 in the afternoon again. at least my mother is predictable.
My mouth tastes like what I imagine a hobo's skin would taste like.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
Within the span of 10 minutes, I managed to make a slip 'n slide on his stomach, threatened to pee on him, kneed myself in the eye, and almost fell asleep on the toilet....in that order.
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
Conversations we need to have while high 1) how mermaids reproduce 2) if blind people hallucinate what do they see 3) reincarnation
Would it be inappropriate to send a friend request to the sheriff that fingerprinted me last night???
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
You ate my ass why wouldn't I remember you
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
It's done, I'm done, goodbye veneer of class and dignity it was nice knowing you
Randomize