We can make salsa ya know, maybe even some hot sauce. That doesn't mean we're married.
Five Mah tais Laser and i skill have not drunk dial you
Her boyfriend was wrestling another girl. But, she said she was okay with it because she kept checking for boners--w the back of her hand like she was checking for a fever
I don't think it counts as a walk of shame when it's someone you've wanted for 4 years. That's mission accomplished.
Chick in class has 69 tattooed on the back of her neck. Target acquired.
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
they have a video of him in his boxers making a snow angel in the hallway is his own vomit and coca cola.
The only thing keeping me calm right now is pretending to chop off everyone's heads when using the paper cutter
next time we make out at a concert please try to refrain from screaming out our hotel room number.. the amount of guys that knocked on our door after you passed out was ridiculous
No lie. I was hooking up with a former football player at UT and mid-hookup I yelled "I'M FRATERNIZING WITH THE ENEMY"
For real, I've been ditched by my boyfriend twice today alone. I fucking shaved for this guy.
Somewhere out there, Gloria Steinem just started to cry.
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
They way I see it is I've wasted 7 years of having these glorious tits. I only have about 3 good years left before idk kids or just gravity takes over and they don't look this nice so it's basically open season.
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
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