...so i touched it.
Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
Gentlemen...shes not going to tie her self to the table...
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
you wouldn't come out from under your bed because you said there were six-armed bears everywhere.
ohhh that explains the pepperonis I found in my sock drawer this morning...
no it doesn't.
There are Star Wars cutouts in his basement. Obi Wan Kenobe watched me give him a handjob.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
I was afraid that she would smell her boyfriend's penis on my breath while we were talking.
Is it possible to dent your eyeball? And how do you "accidentally" go cosmic bowling?
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
He kicked in the door just as I climbed on top of him...and stood there. I felt like I was in a porn. It was invigorating.
Best ethics paper a stoner could write. I called my professor Dr. Superfly Arandia. And I'm pretty sure I used "respect the hustle" somewhere in there too.
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
Tequila. The ruiner of all good intentions.
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