dude i doubt hes gay
I CAUGHT HIM BEATING OFF TO MENS HEALTH!
We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
It's not mothers day until you're vomitting syrup into grandma's toilet. Cherish the holidays
Lmao. We just snorted some mystery powder uriah found packged up in my car, that i know has been in there almost a year... Its adventure time.
When we picked him up this morning the cop said that if they actually arrested every drunk American who pissed on cathedral doors, Spain wouldn't have any room for real prisoners.
I have words... I can't think of them tho. they keep melting together and forming you and I just want to hump it.
That was the #1 scariest moment in my life. I have full trust in you, I let you bite my penis for god sake.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
What's dad's email?
askmom@cause.idk
She showed up ready for sex all night.. with waters and a meat and cheese tray
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
Sooo, my mother is snoring, my ex is sexting me, the guy I'm having an affair with is sending me dick pics, and all I want to do is sleep!
Randomize
