erin looks like she hung out with the sham wow guy last night. she's got the beat up hooker look goin' on
i only shaved half my leg
on purpose
I didn't notice until this morning that he had a six inch RAT TAIL...
Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Had a couple pieces of pizza for breakfast...suck on that Jamie Oliver.
Well, I'm eating cake, watching wedding videos of people I don't know, and crying. Clearly I'm a vision of mental health today
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
Remind me not to get naked underneath a tree I'm allergic to again.
You kept asking her which dick pills worked the best. She's a grandmother.
Does the room smell any better?
Yeah, i sprayed perfume. It smells like Victoria's Secret, if Victoria's secret was that she was homeless.
I shaved my pussy for you. If you complain about a single hair that I missed again, you will be greeted by a bush the next time you go down on me and i will MAKE YOU KEEP GOING
We had a moment of silence for all of the orgasms he gave me with his beard before he shaved it off.
so you 69ed him in the parking lot of your apartment
yah I won't allow him in my apartment
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
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