Todays outfit involves shorts with embroidered fish. This kids gonna die.
Please stop bringing your one night stands to Sunday brunch.
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I stole something. Which direction out are you guys gonna go
Brian got his first ever blow job last night. We should make him a scrapbook.
I know but at least you've never been asked to have sex dressed up like Catwoman
Can I just text her like "yo sorry I fucked your boyfriend, let's go get sushi" or like nah
Turns out the dorm toilet can't take a punch. Gonna be a long year without Mexican food.
I've literally exhausted all the videos on pornhub. It took like 4 years, but I've done it. I did that quicker than I finished college
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
using my tits for other peoples nudes hit me up business in the making
Same encounter she body slammed me to the floor and than humped me
She just took all of the blankets in the house and threw them in the yard, because 'the grass was cold'..
my mom tells me this morning that i was blasting teach me how to dougie at 2 am last night and refused to leave her room until she dougied with me
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