I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
Some guy shouted fuck america during the national anthem, i decked him. They threw him out. USA USA USA!
I picked her up for our first date on a fucking horse. Of course I got a BJ.
The bartender laughed but the manager kicked me out when the mom conplained. There's no way my fart harmed that baby in any way
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Did you ask me to bring you a t-shirt to class or did I just dream that?
No, I did. It's a long story.
5am update: in a toga seeing triple made out with both sexes
how many lesbians have to have their hearts broken before they realise I am not that kind of DJ
Omg no. We ate a raw pumpkin last nighr. We dipped it in BBQ sauce.
For my birthday I want you to get me in bed with Donald Trump. That is all. You have 3 months
That all sounds beautiful. All I have to offer is my shining personality, extensive amounts of space knowledge, and I hear I am pretty not sucky at sucking dick
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
we're like the harlem globetrotters of underage drinking
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
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