Did you see Brett Michaels get knocked on his ass?
Hurt me personally.
Knocked his cowboy hat off... Bandanna was still good though
just landed in detroit. Currently holding a bag of my own vomit. neighbor told me it was the most graceful vom she has ever seen. Kicking off bar exam week in style.
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
how do you tell a roommate that having sex on your bottom bunk is not appropriate even if she has a top bunk that's hard to climb to?
In The Air Tonight was playing in the dentist's office. Had to stop the cleaner to do the drums.
My grandma put hard boiled eggs on her lasagna. I'm not high enough for this.
My alcohol tolerance is way too high for this paycheck.
I introduced him to the male G-Spot. Don't ever tell me I'm not experienced.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
my dad is now demonstrating how to start a fire with a tampon. happy fucking new year!
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Don't worry about it too much, but I just committed us to possibly raising a kid
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