What happened to him?
He was walking right behind us then disappeared.. turns out he checked his luggage at a night club, continued to drink and dance, then slept on the 4th floor of some museum
The guy who took my order at mcdonalds asked for my number. I think we should start fucking fast food employees, they're easy and think we're goddesses.
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
It's great having no responsibilities. In normal life I would be freaking the fuck out right about now. But the only worry I have from last night is where i got this shower caddy full of cookies. God I love college.
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
I don't like him near enough to give up day drinking AND my prostitute costume
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
Is it bad that i wanna bang this girl ONLY because she looks like my cousin?
I just want my birth control to stop making me feel like I'm watching baby seals get clubbed to death any time anything even remotely unpleasant happens lol
Did you just send me an ass picture with a quote from the lion king?
What are you gonna do about it?
I AM EATING BACON AND CHEESE. FUCK THE BULLSHIT.
He told me was "pretty like the wife in some movie where the husband is a cheater." I think I'm gonna fuck him.
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
For some reason she gave me a handjob. It was all very confusing
You said you made a new recipe, but it turned out you just cooked ramen with vodka instead of water.
Randomize
