the bus pole looks like a man who feels guiltyty about something
Some chick in the back of my Psychologhy of Addictions class just did a line off her hand. She tried to make it look subtle.
The last memory I have is vomiting into a box and her rubbing my back saying "you are such a trooper..."
Just watched a guy fight a garbage can then pee on it, screaming "I told you to listen to me the first time!!" San Francisco, I've missed you.
thanks for paying me in special brownies...but brownies dont pay the rent...anymore.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
i get the sense she is planing new and exciting ways to physically harm me during sex
And on the subject of embracing my inner whore, I had two different dicks in my mouth yesterday. Friend, it's official. I'm completely outta control.
I got an assistant at work. First task was picking me up at a strip club. I was drunk and trying explain how it was work related
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
So I have been told that I licked your eyebrows last night
Going to give your dick a friendship bracelet.
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
Do u believe in the possibility of big foot?
You high??
Randomize
