My t9 writes chubies instead of bitches.
either way. win, win.
Sooo, his balls are like... bigger than my head...
Currently in a meeting. i am playing the not throw up game. god i hope i dont lose.
She used to be a real nice person. Now she's just a dick sucking machine
I'm sorry i ruined our friendship with a boner
I'm just sayin' man be careful, that chick has castration written all over her.
It's Friday afternoon and I'm drunk. This is how I cope.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
he says he is going to get you very high and make you leave the country with him
possibly by boat
SORRY BITCH CAN'T, TAKING SHOTS TO WHITNEY HOUSTON.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
once he tried to wake me up from my hangover nap to have sex, that's when things went downhill. he had to go.
He sent me a website link to GIF on Snapchat. I don’t think he understands how Social Media works.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
Three cheers for handling my crush on my boss in an entirely reasonable manner, by having a threesome with my coworkers.
Randomize
