You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
should we take a power nap before our cocaine gets here?
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
It was mandatory to shotgun a beer before we were allowed to eat dinner
I am dressing up to go buy weed. I need to get out more.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
You just kept shouting "I AM AN ADULT!" until he agreed to carry you home on his shoulders.
he just texted me saying he needs a place to stay for the night. pretty sure i just got booty called to my own house...
My pussy is making all kinds of justifications that my mind would have no patience for if it was still in charge
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
I met someone else! And I had a wonderful orgasm! And he wants to see me again, like take me out!
You don't know bruises until you've been banged by 3 drunk bagpipers in the back of thier bus
Imma go take shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
I know her cup size but not her name....
She lured me back to her place with pizza and tits. I was totally helpless
Randomize
