I just walked through a room full of deaf people and farted i love deaf people
Ok so serious question: if one wanted to say the plural of mongoose, would it be mongooses or mongeese?
Have you not heard of Jennifer's supreme lust for William Shatner? She wants to eat Taco Bell off of his love handles
you just used "cock block" and "youth group" in the same sentence. somethings wrong with you.
Do you ever go through someone elses pictures and just appreciate the fact that youre not really friends with them?
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
I'm at your house, laying with your dog, eating taco meat, take your time.
It's like....nice talking about real estate but your son gave me herpes
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
I found it. now I'm going to the gym to be "healthy" or whatever that folklore is called.
The sun is out, the birds are chirping, I made some brownies, I'm not pregnant
This is literally what my 13-year old cousin said to me this morning.
As he put it in he shouted "geronimo!"
Wow... So was the sex good?
Yeah but it doesn't matter. My vagina is not a pool.
If you dont get laid dressed as Woody Harrelson in Zombieland, I have lost all faith in the men of nw Indiana.
Never drinking before a 6am train again. Just threw up at boarder control and had to pretend it was cause I was pregnant and not cause I trashed.
You make Europe seem so glamorous.
Yah. Then he started clapping my boobs together in his hands and started shouting "the seas are angry!"
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