You did that once after drunk driving from a photo shoot
That was very cool/italian of you
Which brings me to my next point, how come italians are so well adapted to drunk driving
I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
I just spent the last hour spooning with my drug dealer.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
just walked past a girl in her cap and gown puking her brains out beside a tree. her friends were taking pictures of her.
I cant talk about it right now or let you guess, but its something you and i would do. Kinda like that time we had the case of beer and went bowling
You hooked up with minors in a golf cart?
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I'm about to punish you for sending me a Snapchat of your boyfriend's morning wood
Just got a handjob from a 19 year old in front of the Parthenon. The Greek god of debauchery would be proud.
At IHOP. It feels weird and sad that your cleavage isn't here for me to try to toss paper wads into.
I'm up in my room and I just saw a naked guy sprint out into the streets from my mom's party downstairs
He just stays over and makes naked pancakes in the morning
My tits became the mascot for the SAE house last night.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Randomize
