Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I just puked in an auto zone parking lot. I'm never eating peanut butter and red wine for dinner again.
ok now this is the second time he's reffered to recieving a blow job as 'getting his pee pee sucked'
As a driver I hate pedestrians, and as a pedestrian I hate drivers, but no matter what the mode of transportation, I always hate cyclists.
Wearing a Sarah Lawrence sweatshirt is like wearing a shirt that says, "I'm getting a degree in substitute teaching."
And for your info. Don't pee outside with glow sticks. People will still see you.
hey, sorry about all the butter. I thought it was gonna help.
It got to the point that I had to make flashcards with their name on the front and dick pics on the back.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
i had a threesome. one of the guys used to bully me in high school too for being gay.
I bet his dick wears a tuxedo.
Today is the day I die from a hangover. I love you, mom. Farewell.
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
When i said you could use my car and have sex in the back....i wasn't being serious.
Randomize
