I overheard a kid saying to his mom at Walmart: "Mommy.. should we buy cups for daddy's spit?"
nobody understood you. You kept speaking french and hiding shit in your boobs
and all i could think was, am i really about to have sex with someone who still thinks that pee comes out of the actual vagina?
The visine ive been using for four yrs expired. in sept. of 2001.....i will never question my eye problems again.
I love how you are more concerned with what i call my penis than the fact i wanna bone some high school chicks
If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
Remind me if I threw up on you last night or if that was just a dream.
Omg calling you in 10 to update you on who I peed on last night
I'm taking it from the chunk of pizza I just pulled out my hair that we ate pizza last night?
I'd rather take 10 virginities than catch something. Right now I should be good, I mean the sex with Jake was so bad he can't possibly have an std
Dude random question. Where you with me when the vulture got electrocuted from the power lines and fell on the sidewalk in front of us?
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Just burnt my tongue. Not sure if it will help or hurt giving blow jobs
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
was that you i just saw walking down the street in only one heel smoking a cig yelling "hello sexuals" to everyone who passed??
HELLLLLO SEXUAL BEING
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