I found your undies. They were wrapped around my leg.
I feel like a panda just shit rainbows on my mind
i mean i'm ok with bufu but if i'm gonna do it it needs to be a mutual agreement, and there are steps that need to be taken. you don't just go OOPS we're doing it now
everytime she opens her mouth i wish that i was deaf
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
In a strange taxi 3059. Battery dying I'm dying. Bye.
Only you would have to block the fucking governor of Tennessee from reading your tweets
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I don't know what to do with my life other than going on Reddit and watching porn.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Are you the reason I woke up without pants?
You threw up a gallon of vomit. I really have never seen anything like it in my decade of partying.
I wouldn't marry anyone who wouldn't symbolically fuck a doughnut with a sausage though.
Our lives are a motherfucking joke
May I the honors of taking your dick tonight?
The honor would be all mine.
Randomize
