question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
I owe all of my success to double stuf oreos and weed.
im vomiting on the 4th floor cause no one knows me there
who loves string cheese????? I LOVE STRING CHEESE!!!
you know...if you didn't give such great head little things like this would ruin our friends with benefits relationship.
Everytime I sleep with him he gives me another hint to what his tattoo means. I'm like a slutty Nancy Drew.
OMG A WOMANS PROSTETIC ARM JUST FELL OFF AT BAGGAGE CLAIM
All I remember is lecturing my dog about how she's a lucky bitch to have a structured eating and shitting schedule.
You know you're at a low point when you're sucking vodka out if your hair.
So. Do you think marshmallow vodka in hot chocolate while eating a graham cracker would = s'mores?
In some strange universe, yes
She had a cast on when I met her, but she blamed me for breaking her arm this morning. I'm gonna marry this girl.
Drunk texting with my high school teacher. This hurricane is bringing out the best in everyone!
From what I heard you ordered him to lick your balls. Unless you've kept a huge secret I understand his confusion.
I don't know what to do about my nipple.
I swear to god if you settle for a trump supporting packers fan, I will not acknowledge your children. You're better than that.
I wish I had a tail.
Why?
...why not?
Randomize
