the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
I think her nose is broken... but I think she's just drunk enough to fall for the whole "sex releases endorphins, so it'll feel better" line.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I can't make Walk of Shame Wednesdays a recurring theme.
We fucked on top of all of our English papers in celebration of the semester ending.
He completely dissapeared at the baseball game. We found him passed out at the hotel three hours later with souviner photos of himself at the top of the Sears Tower.
You are not about to raise that baby deer, you can BARELY raise yourself... Return it to it's mom now.
I think winning the long island race means you lose at life
You were so drunk last night you left the bar to go buy a razor so you could go home with him
K, im gonna wait to get my dick pierced so we can do it as a family function.
I just gave my mom some ones that look like they've probably been in some strippers cooter. Oops.
Haha. Just tell your mom not to smell them
Hey mom, most of this money I'm giving you is in ones. Don't ask why and whatever you do don't smell them.
Sounds legit to me.
Owwww. A manager/ employee sex scandal that DOES NOT involve me! SCORE!!!
He wants to buy us a microwave. Clearly the man is going to fix my life.
If I don't get alcohol poisoning from tonight I don't think i ever will.
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