Can i not drive my cunt home
Just saw a man jogging. For recreation. At 3am. Who's he training to be, batman?
Can you come over to my place and make up for the crap you called sex yesterday?
Good morning to you
Just did my hair and make up at mcdonalds so we're in the same boat.
please tell me i can get drunk off sparkling grape juice. even if you have to lie, please say yes.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
I hit on her. So did Sarah. Neither of us got anywhere. I swear she's asexual. Like Switzerland.
My dream had 1 penis and 2 pizzas in it. Priorities?
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
He has a lot of emotional energy invested in your vagina.
When I said I wanted you to make noise during sex, I didn't mean mocking ones.
I thought you couldn't go near Germans after that restraining order
that was the most beautifully crafted sentence ive ever read that involved the phrase "genitals or whatever"
isnt it crazy how for years we were living our owns lives, and now only a wall seperates us?
stop. eating. my. shrooms.
Is it sad that the most attractive guy I've come across in a week that's not my professor is the man doing my pedicure?
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