can you pick me up an extra syllabus
i passed out in the shower again
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
I swear I could audibly hear her vagina slam shut when you walked up to hit on her.
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
Look. You've gotta stop making this about you, and make it about my vagina.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
Even with having the shower running and music on everyone could hear the alcohol gods making me sacrifice my dignity and meals from the past week.
I don't remember because I was drunk out of my mind, but I have it on good authority that weed cinnamon buns at 3 in the morning with chocolate milk are better than sex.
I can't imagine anything that has a removal ass flap as being sexy
My brain and heart say thanks but my vagina isn't super pleased with you right now
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
You just want me for my pizza coupons and my penis.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
last time we tried to watch a movie together, we ended up having really aggressive sex. during the Lion King. so what Disney classic will we be ruining this time?
fucked one of the teachers, librarian job's going great
Randomize
