I just realized that when I walk away people probably say "wow she really has a drinking problem" and sadly it doesn't bother me.
The karaoke bar doesnt have electric avenue. Ill just have to pick another song and sing the lyrics to electric avenue
i dont think the girl sending me nudes is qualified to pass judgement on me
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
We played "race the Jimmy John's driver". Order, then see if we can finish sex before the food arrives.
Their car went through the first bag of wine on the drive up...clearly 6 bags was not enough.
Can we talk about the fact that I plucked weed off your ass this morning like it's a normal thing to do?
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
I'm spending tomorrow with her. What should my ridiculous personal goal be? I've already got a blowjob while eating a cupcake
So the next time I call you and say I'm going to my first strip club because it's christmas eve eve, and have work the next morning, I'd appreciate you stopping me
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
It was a "have 911 on speed dial" kinda night
He grabbed a pine cone off the ground and yelled "I love cigars" then tried to smoke it for ten minutes.
Alcohol. Making me feel good about myself since 2008
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
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