HE COULDN'T FIND IT! WHAT KIND OF QUARTERBACK CAN'T FIND IT?!
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
You act like this is the first time I literally thought I was invisible.
Using his name makes it all too personal. I refuse to get attached to this one. This is all about ass. He doesn't get a name.
I think I'm still fucked. I can see the electricty going through the street car lines
I feel like strippers are like dogs, the more you show you're terrified the faster they come at you.
By the way, I'm pretty sure your husband is publicly advocating more BJs for my husband, via Facebook.
Wrote my name backwards on the test and asked for extra credit points. Late start booze days are my new favorite thing.
You slammed your face into the toilet and declared you were moving your bed into the bathroom in the morning. Also, you insisted on crawling everywhere because feet are "overrated."
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
I made a joke about The Hemingway being a really boring sex position where you blandly describe all the action and then kill yourself after you orgasm. He stopped responding. I've GOT to stop talking to everyone like they're you.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
I just destroyed that poor boy. Picked him up and put him wherever I wanted, it was like the Pride version of Elf on a Shelf.
So we were fooling around last night and suddenly Like A Virgin popped up on his itunes
OMG haha What did he say?
He told me that if I laughed, I would have to leave.
i just wanna know who wrote "dibbz" on my ass?
Randomize
