did he really ask u insert a warm banna in ur anal?
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
I hope your lack of response means you're banging, not talking about her purity ring.
she said I was laying next to a garbage can in the subway doing key bumps and screaming "its my fucking birthday" repeatedly
I don't know what that means. But if you take off your pants, you'll probably get arrested.
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
A guy I hooked up with YEARS ago just endorsed me on LinkedIn for "customer service".
So will your sis find it a compliment if I tell her I lost out on some awesome dick to go to her bday dinner???
someone just "made it rain" kraft processed sliced cheese. i forgot what it was like to be home...
I just realized I'm having shark week, during shark week.
What??! Dude I'm not having you barging in at like 2 am smelling of cigarettes and disappointment to sleep on my couch and then have an awkward morning with my wife while I'm at work.
Touché sir
His mom came while we were asleep naked and started asking me about my plans after high school... Is that even a thing.
its been well over a year and hes still saying sex with me was epic
Dude my roommate just peed out the window
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