Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
He wouldnt get hard, then started talking about his ex wife. I literally rolled over and started to cry
I just heard a guy scream "it must be five o' clock!!" and another guy screamed "somewhere!!!" out from different balconies.
Already tried, she's too smart for that. I need a Primos "Do your wife in the butt" lure/call to trick her into wanting it
You're not invited to the wedding. They don't want you starting a "who's fucked the bride the most" contest.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
You looked at my sister and yelled at her saying in a couple of years she will be yours
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
T minus 20 hours until we forget our names, find some city cowboys, and g&t into the night.
The waitress at the airport bar just asked me if I wanted a "to go" beer, hahahahaha OF COURSE I WANT A TO GO BEER.
I smoked too much. I'm sitting on my balcony and I keep getting lost. Help me
You realized your blanket was a snuggie, spread your arms, and yelled "tonight I sleep like jesus!"
She shit herself again. We're calling her the "Queen of Sharts".
Randomize
