he smells like the inside of heather mills' fake leg
My birthing hips are way to big to be around all these juveniles.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
a chick just tried to cover her fart by sneezing. it didn't work
so when am I gonna get some from you?
when you dick grows 3 inches
you ate skittles off the table like a hungry hungry hippo. it was awesome.
and I was crying with the towel lady in the bathroom of the bar about the tragedy in Haiti. Then we hugged before I left and I gave her 10 dollars.
Maybe my heart is located in my vagina
I had another sex dream about you but it was very dissatisfying. As you finished you starting singing the star spangled banner. then you left. I was not amused.
Well, we could've been at the bar taking a shot everytime my rash spread. But Noooooo. You had to go out with your non- girlfriend. Lame.
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
What was my myspace song when I went away to rehab?
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
Hey this is your roommate. You know the one that let you have sex with her while you called out your exs name and cried?
I have no recollection of that. You must have the wrong number. P.s. your thongs still on the ceiling fan.
My nipples are YOUNG and they need TWISTING
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