I showed him my bush... on skype.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
I bought a zebra print bikini, I'm gonna be honest here- if he doesn't want to have sex with me in this, he's gay.
Housing is going to charge us for any broken dishes/glassware. Steal as many glasses as you can from the bars tonight. I got the baking dish and 3 plates covered.
it felt like i was a kid in an empty playground. i fucked him on every piece of furniture in the house and then when his housemates showed up i was naked in his bed like i'd been there all along.
$150 bar tab covered by these tits. That's now the going rate. Keeping my bra on during sex unless i see the Benjamins.
So I am guessing last night was a success we are all accounted for and only 3 of us have hospital bracelets on
I mean there are things broken right and left, I woke up surrounded by dog statues, and we had a vodka bubble bath.
I mean, I Just Had Sex in 4 on her top 25 most played list. That's got to give you some indication
If he can't cook well I'm just gonna buy a RealDoll and twenty cats and live my own fucking life
forgot to tell you your neighbor walked out of her house this morning just as I was leaving shirtless
It was an all night sausage fest and I was the lady of honor.
I was so high I forgot how to swallow food, and I just kept thinking "thank god its just mashed potatoes, they'll go down eventually"
Well you’re enrolled in an Ivy League grad school and I’m currently at a 2 star holiday inn in rural PA so who is really thriving here
Randomize
