You know you have a problem when you walk into your bathroom find kettle one in your shower and a note you wrote yourself when drunk that says "panties at jared leto's" on your counter
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
Hey! Thanks for asking, but it didnt go well. He threw up in the car on the way to dinner. Blind dates arent for everyone.
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
after last night my drinking related hospital bracelet collection is up to 13
I guess I really am the only person in this world who can successfully have a no-strings-attached threesome on the beach.
Those titties aren't worth a lifetime of listening to her talk about gluten free yams and japanese manga.
It isn't possible and the very mindfuck of that concept gives me a lady boner.
This is going to ruin my future wedding planner career, but isn't it better the groom knows he's gay BEFORE he gets married?
My only positive piece of news is that my roommate is moving home for the summer, so our stress-relief sex will be much easier to get away with.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
Good news! Blood’s flowing!
Randomize
