I just woke up in the coolest sweatsuit i have ever seen..it has cory's name on the tag...do we know a cory?
if i had a camp nickname it would be Flick Bean
i would hope so, cause i don't think 'i drove off the road because i was getting some head' is covered in insurance
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
Be still, my beating vagina.
You poured your drink on yourself and then said "it's not a party until I'm wet"
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
Can I tell him I got herpes from your bong instead of from that guy who claimed to be an olympic diver?
so far, I've observed him try to hit on 3 girls, 1 guy and a bar stool. Humanity is amazing from a sober point of view.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
Woke up to a note written on my hand that read "just because he kisses you, doesn't mean you have to sleep with him"
next time, write it on your vagina so its more effective.
You were drinking whiskey from a beer bottle i dont know what you really expected...
I have 2 phone numbers written on my vagina. I told you I shouldnt be left to my own devices after tequila shots.
there is a naked boy in my bed & you just need to kick him out because i do NOT want to see him when i'm sober.
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