I want 2 things right now, you or a cig
cig
so high driving around just saw a woman in a pink shirt chillin riding a horse
so high at work that a 35 year old with his kids handed me visine and winked at me. you win with the horse though
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
We let him drunkenly pack his own bags without checking them. Yet no one was surprised when the TSA girl pulled a 12 pack out of his carry on.
I know. But whatever I'll just eat cold pizza and play with my cats by candlelight
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
god it feels good to gold a bottle of opiates again.
I think that typo was actually more appropriate than what you intended.
Naw. I'm tired and I'd have to shave my legs. I doubt the sex or the company would be worth it.
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I was so high last night I honestly think my tears were medicinal
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
