I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
So he saw that playlist i made with his name as the title. i think he's creeped out that I have 106 songs that remind me of him
In my 8 am class there was a pack of birth control on the board with a note saying, "Some dude somewhere is unhappy."
someone should tell her that easter eggs aren't meant to be dildos.
Well, they emptied out the keg by the third kegstand for America.
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
Is it possibile to sprain your taint?
She was that bad?
He called me twice and texted me at 3am. Guess absence makes the dick grow harder.
She just got on the scale. frowned, got off and took off her pants and then got back on
Oh, that was the alley that I ate a pine cone in.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
You weren't stupid you just made an ass of yourself. It's called a birthday party. That's code for night of regrets.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
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