Dude, totally just found out that I've been washing my hair with semen for the past 3 weeks.
there's a guy on campus handing out business cards. you pay him to see if your girlfriend will cheat. the company name is "tying up loose ends"
Haha im about to meet my shrink &i have so much shit to tell him i made an outline
I'm beginning to feel kind of at home at Police stations
What part of "you pissed in the tent" do you not understand?
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
It's a gift. Kind of like morning wood in my brain.
She has an inverted nipple. She told to play with the normal one until the other one pops up.
the police told me I had to sign a waiver stating that my car will no longer be used for crime activity.
He called his dick "The Beast" and said he lived "The Beast Life". He was pretty but it was better if he didn't talk.
Okay so how much boob would you consider inappropriate for smart casual?
No more bourbon. Sleep now. I may die. Pray for me.
Ur dad just showed me a tit pic he got omf
Just got an exam care package consisting of only adderall wrapped in money. Score onr for mom.
Did April legit get married in a parking lot?
Randomize
