I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
What'd you guys eat?
Literally everything that was frozen.
So let me get this straight. You would sleep with an uncircumcised guy whose name you didn't know, but you won't try the new shrimp taco from taco bell?
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Well just watched a guy puke in a trash can then proceed to pick pizza outta said trash can and eat it
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
His last Google search was "will sperm ruin the retina display on Apple products?"
Did my married ex-boyfriend really tell me that he prays for me? Fucking Judas
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
i don't remember much about your party last weekend but i remember you being so drunk you were crying in your driveway about pickles at four am
As a rule...I don't sleep with my friends or watch movies with talking dogs
Is it something I'm going to want to hug you for or slap you for?
How... how did you get Adam Lambert's shoes? Does he know you have them? DID YOU STEAL ADAM LAMBERT'S SHOES?! Oh my God I am so turned on right now.
Randomize
