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Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
So she puts out... but it wasn't worth it
i can't put facebook on my resume under hobbies.
Omg just want to confirm: got drunk, naked in street, fucked in bathroom and puked on bart.
I don't know why people felt they couldn't use the toilet with me passed out in the tub. I shut the curtain. It was like being in another room.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
i go for whatevers easier....i'm bisexual strictly due to the convenience factor
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
Everythings in imax form. Space oddessys are formed. Adventure at every moment and everything is epic. My mouth hass lemons. Yum.
Had a moment of weakness, slept with my ex last night
So that's why our room smells like tequila and shame.
Could someone explain to me why there were 40 individually wrapped burritos in the fridge when I woke up this morning?
Randomize
