How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
so craigslist just dropped their "erotic services" ads. there goes our livelyhood
Just gave my little brother the collection of clothes that boys have left in my room since I've been in college for his birthday.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
Found a bar with a washer and dryer and they serve food. I never have to leave
Half my make-up was stuck to his thigh where I'd fallen asleep after the blowjob.
No our divorce decree will not have a blow job clause. Unless my alimony is greatly increased your bj's have been reduced to fantasy status.....
I showed that dick picture that your date texted you to everyone because you passed out and left your phone unattended. Your fault. Plus his cock was big so his fault too.
Adderal just makes me love life. I want to do so much. I just can't stop thinking about all the wonderful opportunities we have and how lucky we are and I want to make a difference in the world. I just have to reign in my brain and convince it that changing the world starts with a college degree, which depends on studying for these finals.
Please note: when a bouncer tells you to leave, pointing out that their career path makes them a much better judge what to do will not make you friends
Would you mind pretending to be lesbians just for like three emails?
He's on the bus now and took off his Amish hat so just his long ginger beard is present. Goodbye, majestic Amish ginger. Go forth and represent your minority well.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Bro, if we got a house, it'd basically be a revolving door for slightly overweight, but extra cute, sexually deviant girls with daddy issues.
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
Randomize
