its like randi wears special contacts, but instead of colors they make her eyes say "I want cock"
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Just to give you a heads up, I am going home with your ex-boyfriend.... You can't be mad because he was my ex-boyfriend first
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I miss the good ol' days when we would yell at strangers from your balcony while wearing our mexican ponchos in the middle of the day.
what ever happened to our old dealer?
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
If it was any colder outside, the frost from my breath would make a mixed drink
There is a high possibility I will pass out with my hand in a bag of Doritos
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
I smell Vodka. It's me. If anyone asks it's totally hand sanitizer.
I’ve wanted to home wreck him since their wedding. It was a dream come true
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